So I'm walking through Walmart and browsing the markdown movies when I am overcome by this sudden feeling of "incompleteness". As a young woman approaching her 30s, I feel that having this type of void is not good. It is reflexive of discontent and aimless wonderment...a bit of an extreme you say? Not really. Think about it this way...being discontent, dissatisfied, isn't the problem. However, that feeling of incompleteness comes by being dissatisfied with no foreseeable path to happiness. Thus, when you find that the path down which you wonder is bleak or altogether unapparent, you can can deduce that you're wondering aimlessly.
Coming from a past wherein I excelled and overachieved at most everything that I set out to do, I am torn by my current reality of being a "nobody" or a "just somebody else". This isn't the first time that I've attacked myself with the " who am I?" questionnaire. But this is the first time that it's hit me so randomly which causes the idea to concern me more than ever. I live by the motto: "Don't point out the problem if you can't suggest a solution." With that being said ......I'm feeling a bit hypocritical. I have no earthly idea how to DISCOVER MY PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Spiritualists may holler, "Seek God." Ambitionists may scream, "Find what you love and just do it." Free-Spirits mat think it best to just "go where life takes you." But being a more visual individual , I yearn certainty- or at least a ball park visual. And as much as I pray, I've rarely gotten assertions of my future.
As of right now, I feel like "I'm just living llife" (quoted with Rae Sremmurd in mind). I'll vouch to living prosperously, but I desire to live purposefully. So what's the next step ?
No comments:
Post a Comment